After months of working up to the final showcase with my students, the last few weeks have been utter agony.
It had become increasingly obvious that the school was running on empty. I was indeed learning how not to run a school.
Disorganisation, bad discipline, lack of focused tutoring and bad rehearsal spaces were all taking their toll. And it made me realise what is truly important in running a good school.
More than that, I was being asked to direct a final-year showcase for industry professionals in a space that lacked sound, crew, props and set! This was not what I signed up for.
More than that, this was not what I had been working with my students towards. I had pushed them as hard and given them so many tools to use because we were all meant to be working towards a showcase at the Soho Theatre for invited industry professionals.
An afternoon at Kentish Town rehearsal spaces, on a Sunday with no sound or tech crew, did not fit this brief. I was not happy. The students deserved more. The work we had done and the journey we had gone on as company deserved a much better platform.
I had seen first-hand how the new techniques I have been working on for actors have an impact on training and performance
Besides all this, the lack of facilities was starting to get in the way of the work. It was becoming a burden and not a joy.
No money
After weeks of putting up with despondent students, dirty and cramped rehearsal spaces, I got firmer and started to insist on the things we would need. To my amazement I was being told there was no money in the pot for this!
Well what of the fees from the students? I was learning also how important it is to have someone just allocated to bookkeeping, keeping everything transparent.
In a final attempt to pull something together I offered to forgo my fees to hire a sound system for the day. I decided to insist on this and not be dismissed with excuses. In an email the head of the acting programme told me he would like me to leave.
He provided no reasons other than we wanted different things. Indeed, we did if he was not working towards the professional showcase contracted. It was hurtful but also useful.
I saw very clearly how bad management and disorganisation can herald the death of a project and the running of a school. I had seen first-hand how the new techniques I have been working on for actors have an impact on training and performance.
Feedback has consistently been positive with students asking to see me for personal tuition as well. I have taught a class every Sunday for over a year and in that time introduced my students to mediation, toning, sound healing, energy work and visualisations to approach character - something no other school I know of has done.
With my blueprint of what works, I now have a masterplan in what does not work - or more accurately how I would not like my school to be and the integrity I would want it to have. I had not realised how crucial this is to me until faced with the opposite.
It's vital that we are an organisation that is transparent, that delivers on its promises to students and has premises that suit the needs of the training. Making do is not something I would want us to be known for.
Although I have not found a business partner and have not been actively looking I shall need someone to help me with the financial side and book-keeping. I would rather someone did this so I could focus on the creative direction of the school.
It also made me think whether I should gear our training towards some kind of public showcase. At the moment I am undecided.
I like the idea of keeping the training private, not focused on pleasing an audience like the American Actors Studio. On the other hand, some students will only sign up for something that guarantees them a showcase of some kind.
Would I position myself out of the market? Or could this in fact be a strength?
